Depression Learning

worry worry worry worry

Question:

Hello, I can never stop worrying. As soon as I relax I start worrying again. I am so use to being in a contiuous worried state that it feels completely normal to be living in fear. I am also often very depressed… it feels like a very depressive worry. And a part of my brain seems to want to keep making myself feel that worry inside me. I worry once and I worry about doing it again, and therefore I’ve already done it again. But i fear doing it worse. I get obsessed with it no matter where I am… i ask myself how I can stop it and whether totally losing it because of fear is something I should fear. I know it makes no sense to worry about worrying but I do it all the time. There seems to be a genuine fear of something there, but there isn’t anything there. Its embarrasing to explain this, everytime I try it simply sounds ridiculous. I have no question, because I feel pretty much hopless and like nothing can help me… my fears are about nothing and I should just be able to stop them but I do not have the ability to see what I am doing clearly and change. i guess i fear losing myself and losing everything. i guess i fear failure. i fear losing any friends i have because of fear, and i fear not being able to make any new ones. i fear not being able to enjoy myself ever… and i worry about that so much that i do not have much enjoyment in life. i deserve to be burned at the stake, all i do is waste fresh air. Luke Share what you know. Learn what you don’t.

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hello, I can never stop worrying. As soon as I relax I start worrying again. I am so use to being in a contiuous worried state that it feels completely normal to be living in fear. I am also often very depressed… it feels like a very depressive worry. And a part of my brain seems to want to keep making myself feel that worry inside me. I worry once and I worry about doing it again, and therefore I’ve already done it again. But i fear doing it worse. I get obsessed with it no matter where I am… i ask myself how I can stop it and whether totally losing it because of fear is something I should fear. I know it makes no sense to worry about worrying but I do it all the time. There seems to be a genuine fear of something there, but there isn’t anything there. Its embarrasing to explain this, everytime I try it simply sounds ridiculous. I have no question, because I feel pretty much hopless and like nothing can help me… my fears are about nothing and I should just be able to stop them but I do not have the ability to see what I am doing clearly and change. i guess i fear losing myself and losing everything. i guess i fear failure. i fear losing any friends i have because of fear, and i fear not being able to make any new ones. i fear not being able to enjoy myself ever… and i worry about that so much that i do not have much enjoyment in life. i deserve to be burned at the stake, all i do is waste fresh air. Luke

Luke, I use to get anxious about not being anxious.  I got past that stage, but it was strange, I was tired of being anxious all the time, then when I got a break, I’d worry about it.  Guess that’s why its a "disorder." Are you on any meds?  There are lots of meds that may help you.  I’ve been helped quite a bit by Xanax and beta blockers.  I’m not a Dr., but SSRI’s (Prozac, Paxil, Zoloft, etc.) are commonly used to treat symptoms that you mentioned.  If you haven’t seen a Dr., please do. S/He can help you find the right med. You deserve to be burned at the stake the same way someone who catches a cold deserves to be burned at the stake.  (You don’t.)  You need to get to a Dr. that knows about anxiety and depression. God bless,   Mark Share what you know. Learn what you don’t.

Response:

No, Luke.  I do the same thing.  Some of us are just like that.  Meds help, but in my experience it’s never gone completely away.  But I can get to a point you can usually live with. You are NOT a waste of air!!!  You’re NOT crazy!!! You just have a problem.  We all have problems, just some of us have "less acceptable" problems than others.  Don’t listen to jerks and the dumb voices in your head saying "this is stupid, you’re being rediculous, just stop it, what’s your problem?"  ACCEPT IT!  It makes a big difference once you can accept yourself, THEN you can work on the problem.  (I hope you’re seeing a Dr, I know it can make you feel "stupid" and "weak" but there ARE very understanding docs out there – I know cuz I have one of them) — Roo.com       http://www.roo.com A man who lives in a glass house should change in the basement. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hello, I can never stop worrying. As soon as I relax I start worrying again. I am so use to being in a contiuous worried state that it feels completely normal to be living in fear. I am also often very depressed… it feels like a very depressive worry. And a part of my brain seems to want to keep making myself feel that worry inside me. I worry once and I worry about doing it again, and therefore I’ve already done it again. But i fear doing it worse. I get obsessed with it no matter where I am… i ask myself how I can stop it and whether totally losing it because of fear is something I should fear. I know it makes no sense to worry about worrying but I do it all the time. There seems to be a genuine fear of something there, but there isn’t anything there. Its embarrasing to explain this, everytime I try it simply sounds ridiculous. I have no question, because I feel pretty much hopless and like nothing can help me… my fears are about nothing and I should just be able to stop them but I do not have the ability to see what I am doing clearly and change. i guess i fear losing myself and losing everything. i guess i fear failure. i fear losing any friends i have because of fear, and i fear not being able to make any new ones. i fear not being able to enjoy myself ever… and i worry about that so much that i do not have much enjoyment in life. i deserve to be burned at the stake, all i do is waste fresh air. Luke Share what you know. Learn what you don’t.

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hello, I can never stop worrying. As soon as I relax I start worrying again. I am so use to being in a contiuous worried state that it feels completely normal to be living in fear. I am also often very depressed… it feels like a very depressive worry. And a part of my brain seems to want to keep making myself feel that worry inside me. I worry once and I worry about doing it again, and therefore I’ve already done it again. But i fear doing it worse. I get obsessed with it no matter where I am… i ask myself how I can stop it and whether totally losing it because of fear is something I should fear. I know it makes no sense to worry about worrying but I do it all the time. There seems to be a genuine fear of something there, but there isn’t anything there. Its embarrasing to explain this, everytime I try it simply sounds ridiculous. I have no question, because I feel pretty much hopless and like nothing can help me… my fears are about nothing and I should just be able to stop them but I do not have the ability to see what I am doing clearly and change. i guess i fear losing myself and losing everything. i guess i fear failure. i fear losing any friends i have because of fear, and i fear not being able to make any new ones. i fear not being able to enjoy myself ever… and i worry about that so much that i do not have much enjoyment in life. i deserve to be burned at the stake, all i do is waste fresh air. Luke Share what you know. Learn what you don’t.

first of all if we burned you at the stake we would be using up needed fresh air so forget it. You are beating yourself up needlessly generating more negative answers to negative questions-trying to analyze the why and what does it all mean. you cant answer these types of questions when your anxious and your anxious for many reasons but realize that if you bombard yourself with such repetitive negative statements your barin not knowing any better will believe them and you will rationally feel miserable. so you may wish to try to break the cycle. you may need meds to help so check out a psy doc specializing in anxietyy disorders-also please realize that many have been where you are and are past it to one degree or another-wellness is a process a direction you point yourself in not a destination, when you can accept yourself as someone who has an anxiety problem but not rate yourself for it you will be going in the right direction-you may not believe this right now but someday soon you will if you start to realize that whatever you fear the ultimate horrible catastrophic thing you most fear–is something you can handle-in spite of it all—fear= false evidence appearing real.   here’s to hope! LM

Response:

Everything you feel is legitimate.  If you feel it there is a reason.  it doesn’t have to be a good reason, because the concepts of "good" or "bad" are negotiable.  No matter what…  you are you, and even though some of you might suck – that’s ok too.  Without the sucky parts, the good parts wouldn’t seem so good, and without the sucky parts, who would be around to understand what the hell the rest  of us are talkin about???? — Roo.com       http://www.roo.com A man who lives in a glass house should change in the basement.

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hello, I can never stop worrying. As soon as I relax I start worrying again. I am so use to being in a contiuous worried state that it feels completely normal to be living in fear. I am also often very depressed… it feels like a very depressive worry. And a part of my brain seems to want to keep making myself feel that worry inside me. I worry once and I worry about doing it again, and therefore I’ve already done it again. But i fear doing it worse. I get obsessed with it no matter where I am… i ask myself how I can stop it and whether totally losing it because of fear is something I should fear. I know it makes no sense to worry about worrying but I do it all the time. There seems to be a genuine fear of something there, but there isn’t anything there. Its embarrasing to explain this, everytime I try it simply sounds ridiculous. I have no question, because I feel pretty much hopless and like nothing can help me… my fears are about nothing and I should just be able to stop them but I do not have the ability to see what I am doing clearly and change. i guess i fear losing myself and losing everything. i guess i fear failure. i fear losing any friends i have because of fear, and i fear not being able to make any new ones. i fear not being able to enjoy myself ever… and i worry about that so much that i do not have much enjoyment in life. i deserve to be burned at the stake, all i do is waste fresh air. Luke Share what you know. Learn what you don’t. first of all if we burned you at the stake we would be using up needed fresh air so forget it. You are beating yourself up needlessly generating more negative answers to negative questions-trying to analyze the why and what does it all mean. you cant answer these types of questions when your anxious and your anxious for many reasons but realize that if you bombard yourself with such repetitive negative statements your barin not knowing any better will believe them and you will rationally feel miserable. so you may wish to try to break the cycle. you may need meds to help so check out a psy doc specializing in anxietyy disorders-also please realize that many have been where you are and are past it to one degree or another-wellness is a process a direction you point yourself in not a destination, when you can accept yourself as someone who has an anxiety problem but not rate yourself for it you will be going in the right direction-you may not believe this right now but someday soon you will if you start to realize that whatever you fear the ultimate horrible catastrophic thing you most fear–is something you can handle-in spite of it all—fear= false evidence appearing real. here’s to hope! LM

Response:

I can never stop worrying. As soon as I relax I start worrying again. I am so use to being in a contiuous worried state that it feels completely normal to be living in fear. I am also often very depressed… it feels like a very depressive worry.

Hi, I was born a  worrier.  Are you seeing a doctor/therapist about this? There seems to be a genuine fear of something there, but there isn’t anything there. Its embarrasing to explain this, everytime I try it simply sounds ridiculous. I have no question, because I feel pretty much hopless and like nothing can help

I have felt that way before, though, it isn’t anything to be embarrassed about.  If you are feeling hopeless, and like nothing can help it is time to see a doctor/therapist. I have felt hopeless until I found medications.  They can help in ways you can’t even imagine right now. me… my fears are about nothing and I should just be able to stop them but I do not have the ability to see what I am doing clearly and change.

Why do you think should you be able to stop them?  I used to think that, end ended up feeling more hopeless and helpless. I hope you are thinking about going to a doctor about this.  From my own experiences, fears began to escalate, and it took a crisis to actually bring me to the doctor.  There are many medications out there that can help you.  There is no need to suffer, or feel guilt about it.  . Hope this helps.   Maria  

Response:

Luke, Instead of making yourself stop worrying try making yourself worry. This was a technique suggested by my pdoc. I used so much time of each day worrying so he suggested that when I found myself worrying about something I could defer it until my "worry time". Each day at the same time I would set the egg timer for 15 minutes and try to think of everything that I usually worried about. After a few weeks, I found I was thinking up silly things just to fill the time or I was watching the timer waiting for the "worry time" to be over so I could get on with my day. The great thing about worry time is that YOU control it-when, where, how long. Whenever I found myself worrying I would say-save it for later. Best Wishes, Charley – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hello, I can never stop worrying. As soon as I relax I start worrying again. I am so use to being in a contiuous worried state that it feels completely normal to be living in fear. I am also often very depressed… it feels like a very depressive worry. And a part of my brain seems to want to keep making myself feel that worry inside me. I worry once and I worry about doing it again, and therefore I’ve already done it again. But i fear doing it worse. I get obsessed with it no matter where I am… i ask myself how I can stop it and whether totally losing it because of fear is something I should fear. I know it makes no sense to worry about worrying but I do it all the time. There seems to be a genuine fear of something there, but there isn’t anything there. Its embarrasing to explain this, everytime I try it simply sounds ridiculous. I have no question, because I feel pretty much hopless and like nothing can help me… my fears are about nothing and I should just be able to stop them but I do not have the ability to see what I am doing clearly and change. i guess i fear losing myself and losing everything. i guess i fear failure. i fear losing any friends i have because of fear, and i fear not being able to make any new ones. i fear not being able to enjoy myself ever… and i worry about that so much that i do not have much enjoyment in life. i deserve to be burned at the stake, all i do is waste fresh air. Luke Share what you know. Learn what you don’t.

Response:

- Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Luke, Instead of making yourself stop worrying try making yourself worry. This was a technique suggested by my pdoc. I used so much time of each day worrying so he suggested that when I found myself worrying about something I could defer it until my "worry time". Each day at the same time I would set the egg timer for 15 minutes and try to think of everything that I usually worried about. After a few weeks, I found I was thinking up silly things just to fill the time or I was watching the timer waiting for the "worry time" to be over so I could get on with my day. The great thing about worry time is that YOU control it-when, where, how long. Whenever I found myself worrying I would say-save it for later. Best Wishes, Charley

Charley, that’s a really good idea.  Before I started on meds, it seemed my "worry time" was at bedtime.  I think in the years I’ve spent worrying, probably 0% of my worries came to fruition.   I’ve used that timed worry thing for a heartbreak once.  It seemed I was constantly crying about it…on the way to school, during school, on the way home, then somewhere I read to put aside a time of the day to think only of that grief.  I did, and maybe a few days later it was out of my system. …Then, I actually started thinking Gosh, this is so ridiculous, why am I still crying about this.   (during my "timed" period), and that was the end of that! Maria

Response:

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