Depression Learning

Marital Problems

Question:

"Her Name was Lola" l…@poop.com wrote: >The fact of the matter is that sometimes >(most times???) women "pretend" to be interested in the same things that men >are in the hopes that after they get married the man will change.  The >problem is that they seldom do.

We men do change… just not necessarily in the exact path our wives hoped we would. But make no mistake, we do change. Heck, twenty years ago, I never even heard of the idea of having a favorite chair. CJ

Response:

CJMorgan59 wrote: > "Her Name was Lola" l…@poop.com wrote: >> The fact of the matter is that sometimes >> (most times???) women "pretend" to be interested in the same things that men >> are in the hopes that after they get married the man will change.  The >> problem is that they seldom do. > We men do change… just not necessarily in the exact path our wives hoped we > would. But make no mistake, we do change. Heck, twenty years ago, I never even > heard of the idea of having a favorite chair. > CJ

LOL!   That’s good!!!

Response:

Frank, I was stunned by your post. Everything what you said about your and your wife’s relation is EXACTLY how I feel. There is only one huge difference between us. I and my wife both do believe in the Lord Jesus. However, Christians are not exempt from emotional difficulties. Again, I am saying that I feel the same as you do for 17 years ever since I married my wife. I never truly loved my wife, as our marriage on my part was not well planned. I married when I was 21 and I looked at it at the time as part of an adventure, but certainly did not plan it for life. So, the adventure is over and I am still married. EVERY DAY I think about leaving. I left my wife a little over one year ago only for a week. Then I came back but now I regret that I did not have more endurance staying away. You are married for 10 years with no kids. I would say make up your mind now, rather than delaying your decision. I am telling you, that the type of feeling you experience will never leave you. I have the same feeling, and it goes away for a short period (like couple of weeks) and it comes back with crushing power. Sometimes I hate myself for not loving my wife, since she did not do anything against me. I just simply can’t force myself into loving her. However, I do care about her and she would be devastated by the divorce. I don’t want to hurt her. I started to keep a journal on our relationship almost a year ago. I rate our relationship from 1-5 twice a week. When I started the journal, I gave myself one year. At the end of one year I will make up my mind. I just don’t want to live the rest of my life with this feeling. I imagine myself in an apartment alone and the feeling is just so good. I even looked for apartments a couple of months ago. I ended up not moving, but it felt so good just to be so close to freedom. BTW, my wife is in her early 40′ and I am in my mid-late 30’s. Sometimes I find the age difference disturbing too. Take care. Taho "Frank Hardesty" <fharde…@hotmail.com> wrote in message

news:D9BV9.292$[email protected]… – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -> We’ve been married for almost 10 years.  Everyday when I come home, I have a > lump in my throat because I’m unhappy with our marriage.  I love my wife but > I stopped liking her as a friend.  I find that whenever she starts talking > about anything at all, I wish she’d just shut up.  She’s about to go out of > town for 2 weeks and I can’t friggin’ wait to be alone.  I used to be a > songwriter, but I stopped because I know that whatever I put down in a song, > it’s going to be something about our marriage and it won’t be nice. > Sex is so blas

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