Depression Learning

Help – my 8 wk old either won't feed at all, or can't get enough

Question:

Hello there! I have an 8 week old girl, and breastfeeding has been pretty much a nightmare from the start (poor latch, low milk supply due to hypoplasia of the breasts, the lovely SNS, etc…) My challenge is that she is sleepy and barely nurses at all in the wee morning hours, on through the following afternoon, and then when evening hits, she is voracious and can’t seem to get satisfied at all – this lasts until midnight or so when she finally falls asleep after 8 hours of fussing and frustration.  The outcome for me is that I am sore with engorgement for 16 hours of the day, and the other 8 hours I’m sore because she thrashes and gnashes on me. Because she dropped a pound in her first 2 days home from the hospital, her ped told me to supplement with formula.  I did this from then on, always in the evenings when she was hungriest.  I used the bottle for 2 weeks, but nipple confusion occured.  After several visits to a lac consultant, her latch improved and I supplemented with the SNS.  Finally, after establishing a milk supply around week 6, the LC recommended that I discontinue the supplements.  I thought this meant that it would be smooth sailing from then on, but it only created the situation I described above. For two weeks, I’ve been pumping at night and in the mornings to relieve the engorgement, and then giving her what I pump through the SNS in the evenings when she is fussing.  But I have to tell you, it is a routine that I can’t continue much longer.  The SNS is, and always has been, horrible to use – the tape rips my skin, my daughter tears the tubing off my body, it is much harder to latch her with the tube on the nipple.  And anyone out there that pumps at night knows the dread of having to crawl out of the covers, hook yourself up, then wash the parts immediately afterward so they’ll be ready in another 2 hours when you do it all again (unlike nursing, which can be done half asleep, without ever leaving your warm bed). Is there any way I can get her on a more even eating routine?  I had hoped to nurse her for my entire maternity leave, but staring at another 3 months of this is really making me depressed and causing me to resent her (which makes me feel guilty, which adds to the depression, etc).  I love my little girl SO much, and want so badly for the breastfeeding to go well.  Any suggestions you can offer are immensely appreciated. -Christine

Response:

– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hello there! I have an 8 week old girl, and breastfeeding has been pretty much a nightmare from the start (poor latch, low milk supply due to hypoplasia of the breasts, the lovely SNS, etc…) My challenge is that she is sleepy and barely nurses at all in the wee morning hours, on through the following afternoon, and then when evening hits, she is voracious and can’t seem to get satisfied at all – this lasts until midnight or so when she finally falls asleep after 8 hours of fussing and frustration.  The outcome for me is that I am sore with engorgement for 16 hours of the day, and the other 8 hours I’m sore because she thrashes and gnashes on me. Because she dropped a pound in her first 2 days home from the hospital, her ped told me to supplement with formula.  I did this from then on, always in the evenings when she was hungriest.  I used the bottle for 2 weeks, but nipple confusion occured.  After several visits to a lac consultant, her latch improved and I supplemented with the SNS.  Finally, after establishing a milk supply around week 6, the LC recommended that I discontinue the supplements.  I thought this meant that it would be smooth sailing from then on, but it only created the situation I described above. For two weeks, I’ve been pumping at night and in the mornings to relieve the engorgement, and then giving her what I pump through the SNS in the evenings when she is fussing.  But I have to tell you, it is a routine that I can’t continue much longer.  The SNS is, and always has been, horrible to use – the tape rips my skin, my daughter tears the tubing off my body, it is much harder to latch her with the tube on the nipple.  And anyone out there that pumps at night knows the dread of having to crawl out of the covers, hook yourself up, then wash the parts immediately afterward so they’ll be ready in another 2 hours when you do it all again (unlike nursing, which can be done half asleep, without ever leaving your warm bed). Is there any way I can get her on a more even eating routine?  I had hoped to nurse her for my entire maternity leave, but staring at another 3 months of this is really making me depressed and causing me to resent her (which makes me feel guilty, which adds to the depression, etc).  I love my little girl SO much, and want so badly for the breastfeeding to go well.  Any suggestions you can offer are immensely appreciated. -Christine

How long is she sleeping during the day? If she is very sleepy it can be because she is simply not getting enough to eat. I would make every effort to wake her and feed her every 2-3 hours during the day. Don’t let her sleep for more than three hours at a time. If she is very sleepy, sit her up, maybe take her nappy off to stimulate her to wake up properly, then offer her the breast. Hopefully if you can get her into a regular 3 hourly nursing pattern during the day, she will be more satisfied and will settle better at night. At the moment it sounds like she is sleeping too long in the daytime and is not getting enough nourishment. Her fussiness and thrashing at night is possibly just a reaction to hunger. Whenever you are engorged you need to feed her. Even if it is just for a few minutes it will help to soften your breasts. Pumping does not do it anywhere as effectively as baby nursing will. It sounds to me that your milk supply is probably fine so I would try to do away with the SN as well. Feed all feeds at the breast and I think things will settle down. Your baby could very well  be going through a growth spurt and if this is the case more frequent feeding will help your supply adjust to her increased needs. Is she having plenty of wet nappies? That is a good indication of whether she is having enough to eat. They need to be good soaking nappies (if cloth) and not just a scant yellowy stained wet patch – that is a sign of not enough! Hope this helps a little. If as I suspect she is sleeping for several long stretches during the day, then the above should make a difference. — Carren

Response:

You need to get your milk supply regulated to her needs.  I would get rid of the SNS and just nurse her as much as she wants.  There may be a couple of fussy days until yours supply evens out. By the way my son lost a pound of his birthwieght, I supplemented for one day because I was worried about dehydration but went back to exclusive nursing right away.  He gained like crazy and was roly poly by 3 months. Jocelyn Mommy to Ren

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