compartments
Question:
For years I put different area’s of my life into compartments, each separate from each other. I kept everyone at a distance and was terrified to let anyone close. People that I worked with weren’t allowed near people that I played with. I had different friends for different area’s of my life. For many years I trusted no-one, I shut myself down to everyone and liked it that way. I have lost count of the people who have told me that I put a wall up, I make very little effort to maintain friendships, others usually have to put in all the work. I tend to mix best within a group of people and often find it difficult to interact on an individual basis. This is one of the reasons I rarely respond to e-mails or phone calls<in rl Thing is that lately I’ve been letting that wall come down, in doing so i seem to have lost a sense of who i am. i feel vulnerable and a little scared, this is so difficult to put into words, but i’m really feeling lost right now. my life is going well, i’m not depressed, i have a large circle of friends, yet i have no idea of who the fuck i am. it doesn’t help that lately i’ve been dreaming of things from my past and my dad. i used to long for recovery from depression, to get "back to normal" yet in recovery i’ve lost my *normal*. the realisation that what happened in my past was technically abuse and neglect continues to shock me. where do i go from here?
Response:
Seems like you are dealing with feelings that you have never experienced before and that is scary. If your head tells you that your experiences are OK, go with it. You probably do know what is best for you in the long run. Trust you instincts. Stan – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – For years I put different area’s of my life into compartments, each separate from each other. I kept everyone at a distance and was terrified to let anyone close. People that I worked with weren’t allowed near people that I played with. I had different friends for different area’s of my life. For many years I trusted no-one, I shut myself down to everyone and liked it that way. I have lost count of the people who have told me that I put a wall up, I make very little effort to maintain friendships, others usually have to put in all the work. I tend to mix best within a group of people and often find it difficult to interact on an individual basis. This is one of the reasons I rarely respond to e-mails or phone calls<in rl Thing is that lately I’ve been letting that wall come down, in doing so i seem to have lost a sense of who i am. i feel vulnerable and a little scared, this is so difficult to put into words, but i’m really feeling lost right now. my life is going well, i’m not depressed, i have a large circle of friends, yet i have no idea of who the fuck i am. it doesn’t help that lately i’ve been dreaming of things from my past and my dad. i used to long for recovery from depression, to get "back to normal" yet in recovery i’ve lost my *normal*. the realisation that what happened in my past was technically abuse and neglect continues to shock me. where do i go from here?
Remove "JUNK" for my valid address.
Response:
where do i go from here?
Forwards. Whiskery Hugs {{{{{Cattareena}}}}} — — Whiskers
Response:
Seems like you are dealing with feelings that you have never experienced before and that is scary. If your head tells you that your experiences are OK, go with it. You probably do know what is best for you in the long run. Trust you instincts. Stan
Thanks Stan, I’m usually ok about this stuff, but at the moment I’m thinking too much 
Response:
hi again i have done this a lot of my life too, in fact i still do it. maybe it has something to do with the way we were brought up, i don’t know. anyhow i find friendships incredibly difficult and the only true friends i have must have incredible patience since i am terrible at replying to mail or answering the phone. i really hope you get through this time ok, i know you will. i have no idea where you go from here, i’m pretty much behind you. i’m still waiting for things to get back to normal but i know whatever happens you will find a way, love ya, take care, debbie x
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – For years I put different area’s of my life into compartments, each separate from each other. I kept everyone at a distance and was terrified to let anyone close. People that I worked with weren’t allowed near people that I played with. I had different friends for different area’s of my life. For many years I trusted no-one, I shut myself down to everyone and liked it that way. I have lost count of the people who have told me that I put a wall up, I make very little effort to maintain friendships, others usually have to put in all the work. I tend to mix best within a group of people and often find it difficult to interact on an individual basis. This is one of the reasons I rarely respond to e-mails or phone calls<in rl Thing is that lately I’ve been letting that wall come down, in doing so i seem to have lost a sense of who i am. i feel vulnerable and a little scared, this is so difficult to put into words, but i’m really feeling lost right now. my life is going well, i’m not depressed, i have a large circle of friends, yet i have no idea of who the fuck i am. it doesn’t help that lately i’ve been dreaming of things from my past and my dad. i used to long for recovery from depression, to get "back to normal" yet in recovery i’ve lost my *normal*. the realisation that what happened in my past was technically abuse and neglect continues to shock me. where do i go from here?
Response:
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi, I really like the way you worded that. Where do I go from here? Fowards! I am gonna write it on my white board for everybody to see as an inspiration throughout the day. That is so wondeful, thank you. Samantha Now all I need is to follow my own advice ;(
Hi, Sometimes that is the hardest thing to do. Samantha – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text — — Whiskers
Response:
Hi, I really like the way you worded that. Where do I go from here? Fowards! I am gonna write it on my white board for everybody to see as an inspiration throughout the day. That is so wondeful, thank you. Samantha
Now all I need is to follow my own advice ;( — — Whiskers
Response:
where do i go from here? Forwards. Whiskery Hugs {{{{{Cattareena}}}}}
Thankyou Whiskers – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – — — Whiskers
Response:
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – where do i go from here? Forwards. Whiskery Hugs {{{{{Cattareena}}}}} Thankyou Whiskers — — Whiskers
Hi, I really like the way you worded that. Where do I go from here? Fowards! I am gonna write it on my white board for everybody to see as an inspiration throughout the day. That is so wondeful, thank you. Samantha
Response:
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi, I really like the way you worded that. Where do I go from here? Fowards! I am gonna write it on my white board for everybody to see as an inspiration throughout the day. That is so wondeful, thank you. Samantha Now all I need is to follow my own advice ;( Hi, Sometimes that is the hardest thing to do. Samantha
It certainly is 
— — Whiskers
Response:
– Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – Hi, I really like the way you worded that. Where do I go from here? Fowards! I am gonna write it on my white board for everybody to see as an inspiration throughout the day. That is so wondeful, thank you. Samantha Now all I need is to follow my own advice ;(
HI, I have that problem all the time. Samantha – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text — — Whiskers
Response:
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