Depression Learning

boyfriend in trouble

Question:

blah blah.  He won’t leave because if he does, he leaves two younger brothers behind.  He won’t do that. They don’t get it so bad when he’s around.

It isn’t going to improve then, unless he starts hitting her back (trust me on this). The only reason my mother is so nice to me now is because she knows I could grind her into the wall if whim dictated. But this boy really needs professional help. Or help of some kind. — –Qliphoth Evilbastard * Listowner, Esoteric-Emotions (http://www.onelist.com/subscribe.cgi/esoteric-emotions) "The ability to speak does not make you intelligent…" (Qui-Gon Jinn)

Response:

Ok, this isn’t really bipolar related, other than the fact that I’m bipolar.  But, anyway, my boyfriend… He’s diabetic, and isn’t eating properly (which can have some serious consequences).  He’s showing some very vivid signs of depression, but he won’t ask for help.  

I find it really hard to seek help when I’m depressed.  Usually I don’t make it to the doctor until weeks or months later when I’m feeling better. Men may be worse at this than women. I think your being BP is significant.  We are more likely to see the symptoms because we’ve been through it time and time again. In my own case, for example, my wife had postpartum depression and it was me that saw it and convinced her to list certain signs to her doctor.   She would have just sufferred, not believing it, except that I was an expert in depression! Maybe it’s not actually depression in him, but he likely does need some attention.  It would be nice if, for once, your BP can be used for good? Your friend, Tom

Response:

I realize this will be unpopular, but I think someone should say it. Why not report the mom to child protective services and let them deal with it? Nancy – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text -it’s not that he isn’t eating properly, it’s that he’s eating barely anything, which isn’t healthy for anyone, and can be a whole lot worse for him.  He’s depressed because his mom beats the crap out of him any chance she gets, and has beaten the crap out of him his entire life. as well as told him he’s worthless, and stupid.. blah blah.  He won’t leave because if he does, he leaves two younger brothers behind.  He won’t do that. They don’t get it so bad when he’s around. anybody.  He’s diabetic, and isn’t eating properly (which can have some serious consequences).  He’s showing some very vivid signs of As someone with diabetes, I am very offended by that. Maybe he’s just depressed because people overestimate the importance of his diabetes in his life like they do to me. In any case, it sounds like he just needs some motivation to do something. I’d go into specifics but you really need to talk him into being more assertive with this mother of his. Hell, if my mother treated me like that, the sheer feeling it would cause me would lead me to knock her head off. Problem is, if he’s 20 and still can’t get up the nerve to do such things, I don’t see much hope. — –Qliphoth Evilbastard * Listowner, Esoteric-Emotions (http://www.onelist.com/subscribe.cgi/esoteric-emotions) "The ability to speak does not make you intelligent…" (Qui-Gon Jinn)

Response:

Ok, this isn’t really bipolar related, other than the fact that I’m bipolar.  But, anyway, my boyfriend is the victim of child abuse. Is in present tense. His mom still has total control over his life. He’s 20 and has a cerfew. she just appears at his school to check up on him. she’s a major psycho bitch, and he’s afraid of her, although he’s buff as buff can be (he could kick her ass).  He is such a sweet guy. He would tear off his own arm if he though it would help you, but he doesn’t let anybody help him.  I live about 4 hours away from him, and just recently talked to one of his roomates.  Apparantly, he’s getting on average 1-2 hours of sleep a night. he spends all of his time in the library and in the church.  When he is home, he doens’t really talk to anybody.  He’s diabetic, and isn’t eating properly (which can have some serious consequences).  He’s showing some very vivid signs of depression, but he won’t ask for help.  Basically, I’m just try to talk to someone about this so that I can sleep tonight, because I’m very worried about him. I can’t think of anything to do.  I want to see him, but he doesn’t want to see me because he doesn’t want me to see him like this.  .. anyway well, you don’t have to reply.. i feel better just typing this out. he’s a very private person, and only really confides in me. so i dont really have anyone to talk to about this, because im afraid he won’t confide in me anymore if I tell someone about it. He won’t trust me anymore. ANWYAYAYS im done. nighty night mOllY

Response:

anybody.  He’s diabetic, and isn’t eating properly (which can have some serious consequences).  He’s showing some very vivid signs of

As someone with diabetes, I am very offended by that. Maybe he’s just depressed because people overestimate the importance of his diabetes in his life like they do to me. In any case, it sounds like he just needs some motivation to do something. I’d go into specifics but you really need to talk him into being more assertive with this mother of his. Hell, if my mother treated me like that, the sheer feeling it would cause me would lead me to knock her head off. Problem is, if he’s 20 and still can’t get up the nerve to do such things, I don’t see much hope. — –Qliphoth Evilbastard * Listowner, Esoteric-Emotions (http://www.onelist.com/subscribe.cgi/esoteric-emotions) "The ability to speak does not make you intelligent…" (Qui-Gon Jinn)

Response:

it’s not that he isn’t eating properly, it’s that he’s eating barely anything, which isn’t healthy for anyone, and can be a whole lot worse for him.  He’s depressed because his mom beats the crap out of him any chance she gets, and has beaten the crap out of him his entire life. as well as told him he’s worthless, and stupid.. blah blah.  He won’t leave because if he does, he leaves two younger brothers behind.  He won’t do that. They don’t get it so bad when he’s around. – Hide quoted text — Show quoted text – anybody.  He’s diabetic, and isn’t eating properly (which can have some serious consequences).  He’s showing some very vivid signs of As someone with diabetes, I am very offended by that. Maybe he’s just depressed because people overestimate the importance of his diabetes in his life like they do to me. In any case, it sounds like he just needs some motivation to do something. I’d go into specifics but you really need to talk him into being more assertive with this mother of his. Hell, if my mother treated me like that, the sheer feeling it would cause me would lead me to knock her head off. Problem is, if he’s 20 and still can’t get up the nerve to do such things, I don’t see much hope. — –Qliphoth Evilbastard * Listowner, Esoteric-Emotions (http://www.onelist.com/subscribe.cgi/esoteric-emotions) "The ability to speak does not make you intelligent…" (Qui-Gon Jinn)

Response:

i agree with deric and tom. for what its worith. i would answer your post to but i just use food as a seditive take care  jerry  

Response:

I realize this will be unpopular, but I think someone should say it. Why not report the mom to child protective services and let them deal with it?

Good idea. I’d rather see this guy just punch the mother’s lights out and leave her with her head cracked open to carve out his own destiny, but whatever works, I suppose. If someone is willing to pay my expenses in getting there, I’ll gladly give her a lesson in treating others with respect that she’ll never forget. — –Qliphoth Evilbastard * Listowner, Esoteric-Emotions (http://www.onelist.com/subscribe.cgi/esoteric-emotions) "The ability to speak does not make you intelligent…" (Qui-Gon Jinn)

Response:

He is 19 years old. He tried to report her once when he was 16 or so, but he doenst bruise easily, and she talked her way out of it. And it made things a lot worse.  He doesn’t "the system" now I guess. Molly

Response:

He is 19 years old. He tried to report her once when he was 16 or so, but he doenst bruise easily, and she talked her way out of it. And it made things a lot worse.  He

This is why I think the best course of action would simply be for him to take the matter into his own hands. Humans don’t respond nearly as well do warnings as they do to a good old fist in the neck. — –Qliphoth Evilbastard * Listowner, Esoteric-Emotions (http://www.onelist.com/subscribe.cgi/esoteric-emotions) "The ability to speak does not make you intelligent…" (Qui-Gon Jinn)

Response:

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